Harnessing Feelings for Work Success: The DBT Approach
It's where we create, connect, and sometimes feel overwhelmed. The pressure to perform, meet deadlines, and navigate relationships can leave many feeling constantly on edge. But what if emotions weren't just distractions? What if they were valuable data?
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
Originally designed to help manage intense emotions, DBT offers a fresh perspective. It's not about ignoring or indulging feelings but understanding and responding to them wisely. The skills used to handle personal crises can also help in the workplace. They can help stay calm during tough meetings, handle feedback without overreacting, and bounce back from setbacks.
How DBT's Core Ideas Can Help Manage Stress and Emotions at Work
Recognize When Emotions Are Taking Over
- DBT calls this "Emotion Mind."
- It's when feelings drive actions, often leading to reactions like sending impulsive emails or dwelling on negative interactions.
- The goal is to reach "Wise Mind," where emotions and reason work together.
- When feeling overwhelmed, take a breath and ask, "What is this emotion telling me?"
- It might be signaling what matters to you or what you need.
Check the Facts
- Emotions provide information, but not always accurate.
- They can be based on assumptions or incomplete data.
- DBT's "Check the Facts" skill helps distinguish between emotions and reality.
- Ask, "What exactly happened? What are other possible explanations?"
- This isn't about invalidating feelings but ensuring actions fit the facts.
Practice Opposite Action
- If an emotion doesn't fit the facts, act opposite to what the emotion urges.
- For example, if anxious before a presentation, step forward and engage instead of avoiding.
- This doesn't mean pretending to feel great but behaving in line with goals.
Tools for Difficult Conversations
- The skill of DEAR MAN provides a structure for asserting needs effectively.
- It involves describing the situation, expressing feelings, asserting wants, reinforcing collaboration, staying mindful of the goal, appearing confident, and negotiating when needed.
Mindfulness
- Another key aspect.
- It helps observe emotions without reacting.
- Labeling emotions activates the brain's prefrontal cortex, shifting from reaction to reflection.
- This small shift can change how one responds to stress.
Radical Acceptance
- Sometimes, emotions point to things that can't be changed.
- DBT's "Radical Acceptance" means acknowledging reality to decide what to do next from clarity rather than denial.
Build Resilience Proactively
- Skills like taking care of physical health and accumulating positive emotions help maintain emotional stability.
- Daily habits like sleep, nutrition, and movement keep the internal system responsive.
Conclusion
In the workplace, emotion and reason aren't opposites but partners. The most effective people and teams aren't those who avoid emotional intensity but those who train for it. They read emotional cues accurately and respond with balance and wisdom.